Waiting for Anthony: I swore I would not be like this . . .

Thursday, July 12, 2007

I swore I would not be like this . . .

Okay, so at the very beginning I figured that I had the girls to keep me busy, the house to rearrange, the business to attend to, etc. I was not going to get all emotional and become impatient. I was going to let God do His work and just sit tight while the wheels were in motion - HMMMMMM. . . Well, I would like to say that I still feel this way. But... No. I am just like every other adoptive Mom waiting - I get a lump in my throught when I see a little baby boy, I am obsessively checking my emails and answering machine, and I have the most vivid dreams about being out of control, and on an on the symptoms go.
So, for today (and today only because I vow to get right back on the patience bandwagon tomorrow morning) - I AM SICK OF WAITING!!! I WANT MY SON HOME!!! I NEED SOMETHING GOOD TO HAPPEN TO PROVE THAT THE WHEELS ARE WORKING TO GET HIM HOME!!!
There. I feel a little better now. Thanks for listening.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...: Oh Honey

Hang in there!. As you know, when the time is right he will come to us!.

You have been doing great and of course the time is getting long.

I know pictures are coming soon.
Let me know when they come in.

I love you and I am here anytime you feel like screaming
Love ya
Ma; July 18, 2007 at 6:46 AM
Anonymous said...: Oh Tammy...

I know just what you mean. I think sometimes when we have little temper tantrums and pity parties God hears that and will answer, just out of the need for some peace and quiet. It's worked for me a couple times:)!

In all seriousness, though, we must have faith that He hears us and will answer us even when we're not crying out to Him! He knows our needs and He will provide! It might not always be the answer or timing we want but He DOES know. And He is lifting us up, carrying us through this difficult time. Just rest your head on His shoulder and allow Him to do all the work and to bear the burden of waiting!

God bless you and be with you AND your family!

Peace and Prayers,
-Melissa; July 26, 2007 at 1:54 PM

Holding true to ourselves

I know at first glance many have said that we have got to be insane for pursuing this. Many of you have whispered, "you can't afford this - you already have your hands full - maybe now is not the right time - etc. I know these voices stem from heartfelt worry for our well being. I thank you for that. My response is this: When the time is right and we are faced with a prompt from God to march forward - we just do it. We do it because we have faith in Him and know that HE will be the one to lead us through. It is much too difficult to explain, justify, or rationalize a spiritual calling. So often in our lives we know what we must do but succumb to fear or worry. We run from the difficult decisions and take the easy way out because it is more convenient. Is it going to be easy? - No. Are we going to have moments when we doubt ourselves? - Probably. Will we look back on our lives and feel blessed and proud that we held true to ourselves? - Absolutely! For those of you that are worried for us - please just accept that we are doing the right thing. I promise you - you will understand it as you join us in our journey.

You are the angels

We accepted the referral of Anthony on May 17th and began this journey to bring him home. Prior to that, we spent endless hours gathering documents, picking up papers, getting clearances, etc. As we absorbed all the information needed to complete the adoption, we leaned on each other in moments of fear, joy, worry, etc. As a family we regrouped and fed ourselves on communicating how we are going to get through this and why we are doing it. By the graces of God, we are filled with surety and strength that we will endure through this and bring home our little one when God deems it the right time. When that day comes, and Anthony is home with us forever, we will revel in gratitude for all of you that have helped us make this dream come true. . . for you are the angels lighting our path.

The steps to go through . . .

This a summary of the steps that we need to go through before we can bring Anthony home. (Bold lines means they are complete.)

Sign with Agency - Little Treasurs of RI
File I600A
Complete Homestudy
Receive I-171H
Submit Dossier
Dossier approved
Sign POA
DNA Authorization
DNA Testing complete
DNA Results
Birth Mother Interview
Pre-approval from US Embassy
Approved by Family Court
Submitted to PGN
PGN approval
Final Adoption Decree
New Birth Certicate (stating John and me as the parents!)
Passport (for Anthony)
2nd DNA Results
Pink
Embassy appointment in Guatemala 02/25/08

Comments by Delicia

For those of you who know Dee, you know that she is much too wise for her age. You know that her ability to think outward is amazing and that she is a "say it like it is" kind of girl. We have had so many heartfelt conversations about this adoption and she has truly kept me in awe. Here are few of her comments and feelings: * "Mommy, if you and Daddy had decided to have another baby physically, then it would have been your decision. But it is so nice that we are adopting a baby together - as a family because it is now our decision". * "It is not the same as being a big sister to him as it is to the girls - I didn't have a choice with them!" (Got to love the honesty!) * "If the birth mother does change her mind it will be sad for us - but it would not be sad for the baby. If that did happen then maybe God was using us to give him love while she made up her mind." (Oh! the innocence of truth!) Dee has inspired me in so many ways with her ability to see the truth, make fearless comments, and her unspoken faith in God's will.

Comments by Meghan

My sweet Meghan! Always thinking with her heart and peeking into the spirit of others. . . Through her constant (and I mean constant!) question "Did you sign the papers? - did you sign the papers? - did you sign the papers?" here are a few of her gentle words. * " My heart feels so happy" * " I can't wait another minute - I am going to blow up!" * " I am so happy that God picked us to be Anthony's family" If ever there were a child who's heart was larger than their body - it would be my Meggie.

Comments by Courtney

What do you get when you bundle a ton of energy, a hyper sensitive nature, and a free spirit filled with laughter? - you get my Courtney. Here is why . . . * "Okay - just so you know - I will feed him, play with him, and watch him. But if I have to change a diaper w/#2 - I charge $1000 dollars." * " If people ask why he looks different than us - I will just tell them - he looks like my uncle!" (My brother-in-law is olive skinned and tans like a savage) * " What will we do if he smells funny?" (LOL) Her comments speak for her true nature - she is filled with a positive spirit and can make us giggle even in the most stressful moments - for that I am so thankful.